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Enrique Says: Get Off Your Butt!

Hi guys!  Enrique Quintero here offering some advice for more quickly regaining your sanity after a bad breakup.

If you have never heard of how a makeover helps a person move on from a breakup, either you have never had female friends, or you’ve been living in a cave.

Ever wondered how much feistier, hotter, and more confident a heartbroken woman becomes after a haircut, a change in hair color, or even just a single trip to her favorite boutique? And yes, I would love to see men going through bad breakups use the exact same “repackaging” therapy.

Improve Your Physical Appearance To Build Up Your Self Esteem

See, how you physically see yourself influences how you feel about yourself, and vice versa. And while it might take a few sessions with the shrink to improve your personal image of yourself, changing your appearance will take no more than a day at the mall. It might be all you need,to appear like a different person, to realize that you should not be the same person you were in that bad relationship – you should and can be better!

So gentlemen, forget the booze, forget the strip club, forget about not getting a shower for weeks. The ladies definitely know how to play the part of the woman who has moved on from a bad breakup – something that we could definitely all learn from.

Successfully Repackage yourself

Here are tips on how to successfully repackage yourself after a bad breakup (even if you’re the one who initiated it:

1. Get a new haircut. Well, that’s fairly easy. Try out a cut that you have never tried out before and see how much it changes your whole look. When getting that haircut, don’t be too radical or too hasty (I wouldn’t exactly recommend a mohawk); the new hair is supposed to make you look more fashionable – not self destructive. Search the internet, browse the magazines, or go to a salon instead of the barber shop for more stylish options. Get your hair dyed a different color shade too! This is the simplest, quickest way to a makeover – it might be small but we all know it’s very effective!

2. Ditch that familiar scent. Here’s one from science for you: scents trigger reactions from the part of your brain responsible for memories. So if your signature scent is something that makes you remember all those cuddle nights you’ve shared with your ex, then by all means get a brand new scent. You’re transforming to an upgraded version of the person you were, so find a scent to match!

3. Buy new clothes or accessories to change your look. Replacing your entire wardrobe may be too radical and, well, too expensive, so just add enough items or accessories to be a bit more fashionable. Change your look by wearing clothes different from the ones you are used to; swap your shirts for some collared polo shirts, or wear brighter colors when you’ve always stayed safe in your choice of colors.

4. Get yourself in shape. Ahh but of course, how could we miss this? There is nothing wrong with going to the gym and getting healthy. Not only will it add more years to your life, it is also a perfect way to distract your mind from thoughts of your ex. So instead of texting her how miserable you are, go ahead and buff it up in the gym. If you’ve already been doing that, try a new workout like uphill biking or competitive running or maybe go for triathlon; you can even try yoga for more tranquility. Try out something awesome you’ve never done before and become a new and better you!

Change totally! And extra credit – get some online dating hints and tricks from this site!

Gentlemen, women aren’t all about drama and Ben & Jerry’s with girlfriends. Women have all these tricks up their sleeves when heartbreak comes knocking on their doors. Give it a try and thank them (femaledom) later. *Wink and z-snaps*

Visit this site more often for tips on dating and relationships. Watch out for our next blog on the subject of initiating a breakup!  Happy reading!

Posted on 25th November 2013 in Relationship  •  Comments are off for this post
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I Wanted To Break Up With Selena, And So This Was What I Did…

Hello people!  Enrique here once again, this time discussing the most painful subject of breakups, particularly how to initiate it.

The famous Mr. Neil Sedaka sure knew what he was talking, er singing, about when he wrote the song ‘Breakin’ Up Is Hard to Do’. The only thing that’s perhaps more challenging that that is to break up with a woman in the most gentlemanly way. Well, it’s easier to attract women with indicators of attraction – signs that she likes you.

It’s like slaughtering an animal with the intention of making it as painless and as dignified for the animal as possible. It does not even matter what caused the breakup or whether or not you girlfriend deserves to be dumped. A man dumping a girl is an entire world of challenges and yet, sometimes, it just has to be done.

It’s like slaughtering an animal with the intention of making it as painless and as dignified for the animal as possible. It does not even matter what caused the breakup or whether or not your girlfriend deserves to be dumped. A man dumping a girl is an entire world of challenges and yet, sometimes, it just has to be done.

I know… because I recently broke up with SELENA. :(

But first off, I applaud you for being nice and gentlemanly enough to actually recognize the need to be gentle and decent about it.  It’s a clear manifestation of the fact that you know how important it is not to break a woman’s ego even when what you’re about to do inevitably ends up breaking her heart.

How to break up with her the right way… from my own experience (sorry Selena)

1. Make sure you’ve exhausted all means to salvage your relationship. You don’t just wake up with a decision to dump your girlfriend. And your girlfriend does not deserve to wake up with a surprising breakup when everything seemed just fine the day before.

2. Don’t do it via phone or text, email or IM. There is only one way to do it: man up and talk to her personally. No exceptions!

3. Don’t send her the wrong message by being extremely sweet and romantic. It would be a double whammy if she expects you to sweep her off her feet and then drop the breakup bombshell when she’s all googly eyed and in love. Set the proper tone.

4. Keep it private. You don’t need an audience for these kinds of events, so keep it between you two. No, you don’t need your best friend, nor does she need her best friend, and you certainly don’t need a roomful of strangers to watch it happen.

5. Be honest without being rude. This all depends on your choice of words. Being a gentleman is not about owning up all the blame just to spare her from all the ego-bruising facts of what went wrong according to you. Choose your words wisely, don’t be accusing, and more importantly, DO NOT BE RUDE!

6. Do not get in a fight. If she’s the drama queen type, chances are she’s going to throw one right then and there. She might call you names, be hysterical, may even slap you or something like that. She might break down (or break stuff down). Let her emotions flow but keep her from hurting you, herself, and the stuff around you.

7. Make sure that you don’t send her mixed signals.  Sometimes, your choice of words might get too sugarcoated that she totally misinterprets your intention. She might think that you’re breaking up with her temporarily, or that you’re doing it conditionally. Make sure that she understands you fully; an unintentional false hope would make the burden more unbearable.

8. Don’t leave until she does. Keep your entire schedule open for that breakup day. That way, you don’t rush into finishing the whole thing. Walking out on her (literally) after dumping her is adding insult to injury. The most gentlemanly thing to do is seeing her off and making sure she’s safely on her way home (or wherever her happy place is).

9. Lastly, don’t talk about it until she does. Don’t divulge details though, even when asked. A simple confirmation is good enough. Don’t post it up on Facebook either. Let her be the first to talk about it. Don’t even think about badmouthing her to your friends post breakup!

10. Honor the three-month-rule. Just. Because.

Keep visiting this blog for more topics.  You may contact me at phone number 347 622 8310 or through email at enrique@enriquequinterodesign.com for comments and questions.

 

Posted on 12th November 2013 in Relationship  •  Comments are off for this post